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Number 2. And in case you can’t figure out who #2 is, I’ll give yet another helpful reminder.
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Congrats Steve, you’ve won a DVD that can be found in the $3.99 bin at your local carwash! Although, I shouldn’t knock it, I kind of liked this movie…as a coaster.
You should receive an email shortly with details on how to claim your prize. And as like all gifts from Servo, it will be wrapped, packaged and handled by a man. Enjoy.
No fucking way. Did anyone else realize it was December already? I for one had no god damned clue. Now that it has been brought to my attention I’ve been frantic checking all my my November statistics. What? You thought I was going to talk about Christmas shopping? If you think for one minute that I’m going to buy any of you heathens a single gift for the birthday of a fictional character, you’re wrong. When the fuck is Seussmas? Now THAT is a holiday I’d buy shit for everyone on.
Being as it is the “giving season” as I like to call it, I’ve decided that I would give a little something back to the active bloggers. First on my list of giveaways is a brand new DVD, Welcome To Mooseport, starring Ray Romano and Gene Hackman. To receive this DVD simply click “comments” at the bottom of this post and leave a comment relevant to this blog.
When filling out the comment boxes be sure to use your real email address for this is how I will be contacting the winner.
The winner will be chosen at random using a random number generator(RNG). RNG will be loaded up with numbers corresponding to each post and WHAM select a random number. Magic!
You may only enter once too. Don’t make multiple comments. Don’t go off using 300 emails to try and maximize your chances, I have ways of telling. Don’t question me.
Update: Because I’m a forgetful moose, the contest ends December 8th. Better get your comments in before then!
Eastwood is at it again. At 78, this motherfucker is kicking more ass than Bruce Willis, Jason Statham, Mel Gibson and Wesley Snipes combined. Unlike the mega action stars, Eastwood is the war vet-like hero who’s “Shut the fuck up or I’ll have you buried in the back 40″ attitude seems to do the job just fine.
The thing with Eastwood is that he gets in these roles and goes straight for the kill, doesn’t back down and makes it very believable that one pissed off old man can do whatever, without fear of punishment because he’s too damn old anyway. What’s a 70+ man have to lose? His life? Well it’s already been experienced to the max. His health? Once again, it’s pretty much maxed out. His dignity? He lost that after he started pissing the bed again.
That’s why this movie is going to kick some serious ass. Even if the hero dies, it’s not a complete waste. That and it’s Clint, he’s always been a hardass, this should be his last movie(according to the news that he’s retiring) and there’s going to be a lot of old school military rifles, like the M1 Garrand that he was weilding in the trailer, blazing up the ghetto. What’s not to love?
I for one, will be heading off to see this kickass film opening night(Dec 12). I will also be the only one cheering him on when, if, he shoots himself any minorities. Not because I’m racist, but because it makes for a good way to wind up the other movie-goers. With a movie as manly as this, one has to be excited. Who’s coming with?
Alright, I’ve had a few emails regarding the previous James Bond blog. To you assholes who keep emailing me, why not leave some comments? There’s a fucking swarm of you trying to be all covert and behind the scenes, yet all you’re doing is pissing me off to the point where I’m going to start posting your emails…with addresses…and names…Yeah, don’t think I won’t, because I will. And to the 2 of you who thought it was completely necessary emailing me from your work email, I’m responding to your network admins with a current list of your activity on my site, including hit counts, time spent and content viewed. Enjoy unemployment, fuckheads.
James Bond movies are manly, they always have been and always will be. They’re movies in which men can sit down, have a fucking blast viewing, then get up and have a MANtasy. No, not a fantasy. Fantasies are for women and fags running around thinking some prince is going to save them from the evil troll and then they’ll live happily ever after in their precious little home on the range.
No, a MANtasy is every man’s way of exploring his inner-child, his creative side. MANtasies are where men can run around and imagine what it’s like killing everything that moves, banging the vulnerable hot chic or blowing some shit the fuck up. A MANtasy is where the man takes on a creative thought and imagines himself in scenes, or similar situations, from his favorite action flicks.
The James Bond series is ranked right at the top with other action greats such as, Martin Riggs from Lethal Weapon(or for you black guys, Roger Murtaugh), John McClain in Die Hard, Lt. Frank Drebin(Naked Gun), Austin Powers(I didn’t forget about you Brits), Jason Bourne or even Wolverine. It’s men like these that all give MANtasies a fighting chance against the evils that lurk in our imagination.
This Bond flick, in particular, did something that all the others didn’t, they lacked in extremely hot cleavage and boob action. This isn’t such a bad thing considering Marc Foster really pulled out all the stops adding to the almost non-stop action of the film. Bond managed to get in and out of hairy shit left and right, throughout the entire movie. The movie even seemed to start out with a scene that involved a lot of Parkour on Bond’s behalf, which was a huge woody for me.
The women totally didn’t appeal to my MANtasies at all, both women lacked any sort of heavy chest or sex appeal at all, which leads me to believe that Marc Foster’s dick is in a jar, placed precisely on his boyfriend’s night stand. Seriously, disappointing. Hell even the acting skillset of these two ladies was about as talented as a kid trying to hammer a square block into a circle hole. Judy Dench(M) played a sexier role that those two board-chested bimbos. I found that throughout the movie, Judy Dench gave me more wood with her, “Bond you’re a dumbass.” attitude than either of the lead girls would have done in the nude.
Did I mention the action ruled?
The storyline was even killer, it provided for a lot of confusing twists and set up those badass fight scenes and shootouts. Bond at one point is believed to have killed another British special agent and he becomes outcast from MI6 until debriefing. This leads for even more suspense and fighting because both sides are now out for bond.
Blah, blah, there’s way more to it all, but I don’t think I’ll bore you with any of it. You’ll have to either pirate the movie or go to it in the theater. Either way, I didn’t hate it, not at all. I’ve got to go though, some asshole just kicked in my door and I need to lay 3lbs of 9mm lead to his gullet.